ARC Review | Delusions

3 stars

There are some relatable parts to this book, and some very un-relatable parts. Cazzie suffers from a myriad of mental health issues, which she talks about throughout the book. There’s depression, panic attacks, anxiety, and they’re all laid out pretty bare. Her descriptions can be relatable for anyone who has suffered from any of these. The problem is, she doesn’t seem to want to do anything about it.

The book mainly focuses on the year before her 30th birthday and all the anxiety this brings. She struggles with entering a new decade while feeling she has nothing to show for it, and feels like the clock is ticking. This part I get – I recently turned 40 and have felt a lot of the same. I don’t have a lot of the typical things to show for my life, like a husband and kids, but I do have other things. It’s getting over that societal expectation that can be hard. You feel like people wonder why you don’t have these things and what’s wrong with you that you don’t. You have to realize that life isn’t the same for everyone and there isn’t a certain age at which you have to attain certain things.

Here’s where the problem lies – while I had those struggles with expectations, along with some depression, I actively worked to overcome them. It feels like Cazzie never really tries to work through her issues, nor does she want to. It’s a constant stream of doom and gloom with no light at the end of the tunnel, with a side of privilege. I don’t think she flaunts her privilege a ton, but it is definitely still there. You can see this on display as she talks about the depression she has over a guy she only sees during the summer, which happens to be on Martha’s Vineyard, where there is nothing going on except dinner parties and lounging around. It is hard to relate to someone who has had everything handed to them on a silver platter, though I feel she is more relatable than some. Those parts come through when she is talking about the more mundane parts, like the interactions with her sister or the dread she feels over being thrown a birthday party. The other problem is the repetition. There is so much of it that it’s easy to feel your attention drifting. It’s like random diary entries were thrown in with no editing at all. While this can make it feel more real, it can also be distracting,

I do think this was mostly enjoyable, mainly because I could connect with the anxieties over age and societal norms. Other people, especially women about to enter a new decade, will probably relate to these same things.

ARC Review | Meet Me Under the Lights

3.5

A pretty cute, but typical YA romance. Nothing wrong with that of course, as long as you know what to expect.

This is told in dual POV’s, which I think worked pretty well. Eliza and Reed’s voices are very distinct, so it’s easy to tell who is talking. Both characters also feel really fleshed out. You can easily understand their motivations and wants, and most of the issues they have with each other and those around them. I say most because there are a few things that are never quite explained, though you can guess what they are. They have a strong dislike for each other and their families, as Eliza’s family supposedly did Reed’s family wrong ages ago, and the bitterness has carried on through the years. There is a bit of a Romeo and Juliet undertone, with it being a “forbidden” love between them and feuding families, along with the fact that the theater Eliza belongs to is putting on Romeo and Juliet. It can feel a bit insta-lovey at times though, with how fast it seems they go from hating each other to liking each other.

As far as the side characters go, I wish we had gotten a little more explanation on Ben and his situation. He was Reed’s best friend and was obviously struggling with something heavy, but it’s never fully explained. What exactly did Erin do to him and why is it still affecting him so much? I would think that if it was such a big deal, we would know what it was. Otherwise it just feels like Ben is not maturing or taking any responsibility. Lauryn and TJ were both likable and fit well into their respective roles. I did struggle a bit with Eliza’s dad. He was such a jerk through most of the book, yelling and basically saying that whatever he says goes and no one else can have an opinion. But then at the end he was like a whole new person. It was a bit odd. I’m glad, but it also didn’t really fit.

There is some drama towards the end, but then everything pulls together nicely. Too nicely really. All conflicts and problems get wrapped up very nicely with a bow on top. It doesn’t quite feel realistic, but this is YA romance I guess.

It’s a cute story and I think anyone who likes YA romance will enjoy it. You might just have to look past a few things.

Also, Yankees suck. #bostonredsoxforever

ARC Review | Murder Will Out

3 stars

This wasn’t a bad mystery, but it wasn’t an amazing one either. I think my biggest problem was the characters. None of them really stood out to me, except Geralt. And of course with that name, I kept wanting to picture Henry Cavill, instead of the hobbled old man he really was.

When Willow learns of her godmother Sue’s death, she returns to Maine for the funeral. She had been away from Maine for years and hadn’t spoken to her godmother during that time due to some falling out between her parents and godmother when she was a child. When she gets there, she discovers that people aren’t nearly as welcoming as she thought and there’s a lot of hostility towards her. This is where I began having an issue with the characters. Willow is extremely meek and timid. People treat her terribly and she just puts up with it, except for when it comes to Nick. They apparently had some issue when they were younger, but this is never explained. It’s hard to understand what is going on between them, when their relationship is never fleshed out. As for the other characters having such an issue with her, I didn’t really buy it. Rina, who was her godmother Sue’s fiancee, hates Willow because Willow didn’t talk to her for years. But when the falling out happened, Willow was still a child. She thought that she might have been the reason she couldn’t see Sue anymore, and was hurt. Rina’s hatred doesn’t really seem justified, though it’s more justified than anyone else’s. Other people, like Mac, hate Willow simply for existing. They’ve never met, but Mac feels like she should hate Willow on principle. There’s also lots of people being angry at Willow for not telling them things, when she has no reason to trust them. The only character who really felt fleshed out and real was Geralt. While not a particularly likable character, he definitely fit what he was supposed to.

The most interesting and likable part of the story is Cameron House. It sets the tone as a creepy, gothic mansion holding plenty of secrets. Many of these secrets are revealed throughout the story and the house and its occupants are what really give the story substance. Without them, this would have fallen off a lot more. The mystery isn’t particularly deep, and anyone who regularly reads mysteries can probably figure it out before the halfway mark. With that being said, it’s still pretty decent for a debut, and I think the author has potential to write some good books. They just need a bit of polishing.

ARC Review | Platform Decay

4 stars

Murderbot is back, and is just as much of an emotional disaster and sassy ass-kicker as always. This was a good entry into the series, but I can’t say it really moved along the main story very much.

Murderbot is sent on a mission to find and rescue several people, which of course does not go as planned. The biggest problem was that in between all the fighting, there is a whole lot of nothing. We get plenty of descriptions of Murderbot and company traveling in some way to their next destination – and while there is some tension, it can also be rather dull. The action parts are all very well done, and Murderbot’s internal diatribe is amazing like usual. The interactions between Murderbot and the kids was pretty great, though there wasn’t as much as I was expecting. The other issue, besides the trek to Mordor, was that it was very hard to picture the space station they were on. This may or may not be a me thing, but I found it harder to picture from the descriptions given. The ending was a bit confusing as well. It seemed very anti-climatic, but this could of course change as the series continues. I would hope so, as it seems like it should been a bigger deal. This is something we’ll just have to wait and see on.

Anyone who enjoys this series will enjoy this book. It still has all the elements of previous books that have made them so likable, and even though there were a few things I had issues with, I still really enjoyed it all around.

ARC Review | The Wandering Queen

3.5

I’m not an expert on the story of Dido. I know the basics, but I haven’t read the Aeneid so I am missing parts of the story. The writing in this is fantastic for the most part, but where it lacks is in the emotions. We are told about all these different emotions Dido is feeling, but not really shown. It makes for a disconnect in the story.

This is told in a dual timeline format, with some chapters being dedicated to Elissa when she still lived in Tyre, and the rest to when she has fled her home and founded a new city, Carthage, and taken up a new name, Dido. Elissa is dealt a bad hand from the get go, with her father’s dying wishes being changed and her brother taking over the kingdom. She carries on the best she can, and eventually marries and falls in love with a priest named Zakarbaal (the placement on those two things occurring is intentional). Her husband’s death is the eventual reason that she flees Tyre, but this is where the lack of showing in emotions comes in. We are told how sad she is over it, but we aren’t shown. It’s really hard to believe she’s as upset as she is, when there is such a disconnect.

After fleeing with many of the citizens of Tyre, they eventually land and found a new city, Carthage. Here Dido has sworn to never love or marry, though she has received interest from Iarbas. She rules her city well, but faces the daunting loneliness of ruling alone. I think. Again we are told these things but not shown. Aaaaand then Aeneas shows up and throws everything into turmoil. The promise Dido made to her first husband is gone as she is quickly swept up by Aeneas. As stated above, I haven’t read the Aeneid so I can’t speak for Aeneas there, but in this I have a hard time understanding why Dido fell for him. He shows himself to be a rather cold and almost cruel person right from the get go, while Iarbas was gracious and kind. I know we can’t always help who we fall in love with, but damn, I would have thought she’d gain more wisdom as she grew up, not less. The ending is also completely different than how I know Dido’s story originally ended, and I can’t decide if I agree with it or not. There’s an argument to be made for both. It’s something I’ll have to think on more.

This is still a good book, and I enjoyed the writing besides the telling vs. showing when it comes to emotion. I think it would have helped to now Dido’s story a little better. I’ll definitely need to check out the Aeneid soon.

ARC Review | Wolf Worm

4 stars

So this was horrifying.

I remember a while back my best friend having a keen interest in botflies. She loves entomology, and will get vested in different insects at times. We also happened to be pet groomers at this time, which I think fueled the interest. We never found botflies on an animal, but there was always the possibility. I remember the discussions we’d have about them, and just how horrifying and gross they can be. They are not something I’d ever want on me, and I don’t particularly want to come across them in my day to day life either.

The book follows Sonia Wilson, who has taken a position with Dr. Halder to paint insects for his book. When she arrives at his home, she can tell something is not right, but can’t explain what it is. The mystery slowly unfolds, and I do mean slowly. It moves at a snails pace for the first half, and then picks up a lot for the second half. It’s worth it to stick with cause it will pay off in the end, but it can be a bit of a struggle at times. There are a few things that happen here and there in the first part to deepen the mystery, but aren’t explained until nearly the end. I would have liked to know a little more about the others, but I suppose that’s part of the mystery.

This book is really not for the squeamish. If you have a tough time with insects, especially the parasitic kind, or reading about said insects infecting humans or animals and what that entails, this is not the book for you. I’m not a squeamish person generally, but even I had moments with this, just cause I know what these insects can do. If this kind of thing doesn’t bother you, and you like a unique kind of horror, then I’d definitely give this a shot.

ARC Review | The Unwritten Rules of Magic

3 stars

This was not really what I was expecting. It’s marketed as a book featuring magical realism that also touches on themes of grief, coping, and love, but there is very little magical realism to be had. I was expecting something a little more along the lines of Sarah Addison Allen’s books, but that is definitely not the case here. The story is about family and the complicated relationships they contain, with the magical realism almost feeling like an afterthought..

The book follows Emerson, who is dealing with the recent death of her father, along with a daughter who doesn’t want to speak to her and an alcoholic mother in denial about her addiction. Emerson can be hard to like at times – she is very controlling and can’t accept anyone wanting to make their own decisions. While cleaning out her father’s belongings, she comes across his old typewriter than he refused to let anyone touch. She takes it home, uses it, and discovers it can make wishes come true. This is about the extent of the magical realism, and really, it almost feels like coincidence at times. Emerson uses the typewriter much like her father did – to try and control people’s lives to fit what she thinks should happen. It can be really heavy handed at times with the lessons the reader is supposed to take from the story. I appreciate the lessons, but I prefer being able to suss them out myself and not have them smack me in the face.

I was also not a fan of how Emerson reasoned with her daughter over her secret (which I guessed pretty early on). This is one of those hot button topics, and everyone will have a drastically different take, but I really didn’t agree with how it was handled by either of them. And then Emerson immediately wanting to use the typewriter to erase everything was really grating.

This isn’t terrible – I think a lot of people will probably relate to it rather well, as many people do have tough family dynamics. Emerson and her choices just made it difficult to enjoy at times.

ARC Review | Skylark

4 stars

This novel is told in dual timelines, though they are not connected with each other in the usual way. Generally you expect dual timelines to either feature at least one character in both, or several generations of a family, but this one has neither. However, the stories are connected, but more so with themes – of resistance, struggle, and hope.

The first timeline is in 1664, and follows Alouette, the daughter of a dyer who is trying to perfect a shade of blue in the hope that this will save her and her father. It does the opposite; they are caught by the Dyer’s Guild and sentenced to prison. Her father is sent to a men’s prison, while Alouette is sent to an asylum for women deemed “unworthy.” They are women considered insane, simply because they fought back, had ideas, committed adultery. They are subjected to cruel treatments meant to “cure” them and stripped of all dignity and free will. Here we find Alouette’s struggles, and see her try and resist and dream of a better life.

The second timeline is in 1939 and follow Kristof Larsen, a Dutch psychiatrist living in Paris. He has already dealt with a personal tragedy involving mental illness, and believes he can save the soldiers suffering from psychotic breaks (now known as PTSD), instead of leaving them to suffer in silence or be subjected to cruel treatments, He meets a family living in the same building and befriends them. This family, the Brodsky’s, is Jewish, and slowly become subjected to the horrors of the treatment of Jews during WWII. Not only does Kristof try and resist the Germans and save his patients when the Germans overtake his hospital, but he becomes the lifeline for Sasha, the Brodsky’s teenage daughter.

Both timelines feature a character thrust into a situation where they must make a choice – resist or conform. Alouette must decide whether to let the asylum chip away at her until there’s nothing left, or find a way to escape. Kristof must decide whether to let the Germans destroy his patients and friends, or find a way to try and save them. There are many struggles, times when both characters feel like giving up, despair, but also hope and the will to survive. An excellent read for anyone who loves historical fiction and novels of WWII.

ARC Review | The Last of Earth

4 stars

One of my biggest dreams is to fly to Nepal and hike to Everest Base Camp. Reading this gave me so much imagery for that, though the characters in this are journeying to Tibet. It is very image driven – there are so many descriptions of the landscape and weather, you really feel as if you are there.

Back in the late 1800’s, Tibet was closed to all outsiders except for Indians looking to trade goods and make pilgrimages. During this time, many foreigners tried sneaking across the border, whether for their own ambitions and glory, or because they were hired by their governments to spy. The book follows two parties that are heading to Tibet, both of which have a foreigner trying to sneak in. One features Balram, who is guiding an English captain who wishes to map the Tsangpo River. Along with them are several other bearers, who help to carry the supplies, shepherd the sheep brought along, cook the food, and whatever else is necessary to complete the trip. The second follows Katherine, a half English, half Indian woman who wishes to be the first woman to see Tibet. She has hired a guide by the name of Mani to help her.

The story can be incredibly slow at times, as it is very character and image driven. Though there is the plot of each team trying to reach Tibet, it’s almost second to the characters themselves. You learn a lot about Balram and his bigger reason for joining the captain, Katherine and how she’s felt out of place for much of her life, and a mysterious man named Chetak, who appears to help both parties at times. There are so many descriptions of the landscape and the trials of traveling through such harsh land. There were no modern conveniences that people today would have available; it is all tents (if everyone was lucky enough to sleep in one), carrying all the supplies and food for the entire trip, no other modes of transportation besides walking. Even mountain trekkers today generally have the luxury of towns along the way with inns and fresh food. There is tension and a few accidents, but for the most part there is very little action.

I really enjoyed the descriptions of the land and hardships of trekking. The characters were all well done and you could really understand their reasonings for what they do. It’s a great book for anyone who enjoys descriptive, character driven historical fiction, but those wanting a faster pace may struggle with this.

ARC Review | The Copywriter

3 stars

If I could pick one word to describe this book, it would be pretentious. I’ve never been a fan of books where the characters have an over-inflated sense of self and try to say things that sound super deep but are really nonsense. Someone saying they are a journalistic language sculptor and then going on to describe what that means – how they went to Germany and trekked through a forest every day to masturbate into spiderwebs and therefore cum is speech because the etymological root of semen is ‘seed’ is wild. Also, I didn’t think the sentence “is your cocaine gluten free” would be something I’d ever read. And can someone explain to me how Lord of the Rings is supposed to be anti-Semitic? Because that one makes no sense.

The first half follows the narrator as he discusses his life with his girlfriend, a few close friends, and his job. There are some quite eye-roll inducing sentences (see above), but nothing profound. The second half of the book was more enjoyable than the first. It was a bit more relatable, with the narrator trying to figure out what do after he loses his job and girlfriend, then embarks on a road trip while blowing through his savings to try and find himself. The writing is better, the sentences less awkward (though there are still a few), and it doesn’t drag quite as much.

I think this book will appeal to a very specific audience, which I am not a part of. I can see what the author was trying to do, but it really isn’t my cup of tea.